17. Deep Healing And Surrender with Sophie Delhoulle

Ep #17: Deep Healing And Surrender with Sophie Delhoulle

Welcome to the Make Money Living Your Purpose Podcast, I′m Prosperity Coach Karen Powell and this is the podcast for heart-centred leaders, innovators and creatives who dream of leaving their nine-to-five to pursue their passion project, but don′t know where to start. I′m sharing my proven process that will help you heal your money mindset and figure out your own unique purpose in life. Let′s go!

Karen: Hey there. Welcome back to the show. Thank you so much for being here. I have some very special episodes lined up for you this month. I'm interviewing members of my Money on Purpose community so that you can get an idea of what the program is about, how it can help you clear out your money blocks as well as all other kinds of blocks and get clear on your purpose so you can start making the impact that you want to make in the world. 

And I thought it would be fun and really useful for you to hear from people who have gone through the program and can share with you firsthand what kinds of changes they've made in their lives, what kind of healing they've experienced, and also what they're creating as a result of going through the transformational process that is the Money On Purpose journey. And I love to call it a journey because it's really much more than just a course or a program. It's really about connecting to an energy and a process that carries you and takes you on a journey of deep healing and very exciting creation.

I have a most amazing woman on the show today. Her name is Sophie Delhoulle and we're just going to have a conversation about how Sophie experienced the Money On Purpose journey and how my mantra that I expressed throughout the journey, which is one of simplicity and keeping things simple, you've heard me talk about that on other episodes, how that helped her to navigate her healing and creating journey. So welcome to the podcast, Sophie. 

Sophie: Hi Karen. Thank you so much for having me on the podcast today. It's a very big honor for me to be here. Thank you so much. 

Karen: Go ahead and let us know who you are. 

Sophie: I am Belgian, so I live in Belgium and I trained as a lawyer here. I worked at the bar and then in corporate legal jobs. I'm still in the corporate world today, although I started this journey back in 2019 when I was hit by burnout. I've always been a very eager lawyer, very adamant to deliver first class work. And that may sound a little bit, I don't know, arrogant in a way possibly, but that's kind of the work ethic that I've been trained into. And to some point that has served me very well. It has enabled me to build a very comfortable and nice life with my husband and three children, but it also has brought me to exhaustion and to just not knowing anymore back in 2019 what to do next with my life. 

I hit rock bottom at that point and I started to try and look at life from a different angle and I've started to read books, self-development books, and to embark on some online trainings with a number of teachers where I've met some really good friends, one of which was already part of your community, Karen, and she has brought me to you. 

She told me, Hey, I work with this coach Karen, and I'm doing all of this inner work with her, and why don't you join her program called Money On Purpose. That's how I came to you, Karen. And that's how in 2020 I was part of that cohort on the Money On Purpose class. Well, it's not a class, it's really a community as you say. 

Karen: No, it's not a class. It's more of a journey, isn't it? And we can talk about what that journey was like for you when you showed up. Why don't you tell us what made you be brave and join something that you didn't really know exactly what it was about? What was the feeling or the intention that you had for your life back then? What was needing change? What was needing healing? What was it that brought you to actually join? 

Sophie: I felt stuck. I felt stuck because I had ticked all the boxes that I had decided for my life when I was I guess a teenager or a young adult, but I didn't know where to go next. I was really stuck. And also I was feeling an emptiness in my heart. I had all of these successes. I guess I had succeeded in building a career, building a family, having many friends, and on the outside everything looked perfect. 

But in the inside of myself, I felt like something was deeply missing. I felt, who is this person? Who is this Sophie? That's not the real me. I'm lacking excitement. I'm lacking joy. I'm lacking creativity in my life. And also I had this very flawed relationship with money where the need to make money and the need to have money first before I could do anything else was really very present in my life at that point. 

And I felt that I had to tick all of the right boxes as presented by society. You have to be successful at work and make good money and all of that. And then in the remaining time, you can create art or be the real you, but you have to do all of the other stuff first. And that felt completely disheartening to me. I was very unhappy and I didn't even dare to say it because I was like, how do you dare to say that you're lacking something when you have everything? And I felt ashamed. I felt wrong. I felt like a bad person because I wasn't feeling grateful for what I already had. 

Karen: The words you're saying are just resonating with me so much. When I was back in corporate I felt that same way where I should be happy. I have everything. People are looking at my life and saying, you've got everything. How dare you say you're unhappy? How dare you want to make a change? And it makes you feel so bad about yourself. Like, oh my gosh, what am I doing wrong? What kind of a bad person am I to be asking for more out of life? 

So you're doing all these different things, reading the books, taking courses, trying to get certifications in yoga and things like that. And then you join Money On Purpose. And let's kind of go into a little bit about your journey. I know when we were talking the other day, you said something about you felt like you were kind of hopping onto this boat, that you didn't know where it was going but you just felt like it is something to hop onto. And there was just a feeling of, okay, this is the next piece of my journey, this is the next piece of my puzzle. What did it feel like to hop into that boat that is the Money On Purpose journey? How did that feel and what did you find was keeping you afloat and keeping you going on a healing journey? 

Sophie: Yeah, thanks for that question. I felt very much supported all along the journey. So indeed the map is very well done. It really pictures the journey really well, the little person on Comfort Zone Island and looks like they're really not doing anything with their life. So they're very comfortable indeed. But it's really, I mean for me, the map really showed all of the emotions and all of the stations that I was embarking on, but I felt supported by the group. 

So for me, the Facebook community and the Facebook group that you've created have felt very, very supportive in the ability to listen and to read what other people were going through, how they were experiencing the program. And all of the sessions that you hold there on the weekly calls were really great opportunities to share how I was experiencing the work and how others were experiencing it also. 

It really helped reinforce a feeling of community, a feeling of, I'm not in this alone. I am in this with other like-minded people who have also made that decision to seek what they're really after in life and to build a life that is really meaningful to them rather than just linger in the comfort of what they've built to date without a real excitement in their life. So that was all of those elements that you put together and that you provide along the journey were really supportive and helpful for me to move through the journey. 

Karen: And I think just having a map, not that it's the same for everyone, everyone's not going to go through the map exactly the same. But what it is, it's after working with people for over 20 years now through transformational journeys, through 90 day journeys of deep self-inquiry and big intentions for our lives going forward and doing that myself as well in my own healing journey, there are certain things that are going to pop up. I've seen them time and time again. It is part of the journey when we go through some of these challenging times, these challenging parts of the journey. Like being on these false summits like, oh, I thought it was done. And here I am at the summit and I see, oh no, there's another one coming up. Or there are these winds of resistance that are just pushing me back, even though I know I want to be on this path. 

And so what I love about having a journey map in this program and having other people who are like-minded, like you just said, who are going through a similar kind of experience is that we are all in this together and this is normal. This is what happens when you embark on this kind of intention for creating something bigger in your life for yourself. It's going to take you out of your comfort zone. It's going to give you some challenges along the way. 

You're going to feel like you're inside the dark forest and you can't see where you are and what's happening, but you can feel the path underneath you. And I think that just the simplicity of, oh my gosh, this can happen and this can happen and this can happen, there is a certain simplicity about being on this kind of a journey where there's really only a couple things to focus on. 

And one of those, which is on the map, is the lighthouse statement. And I don't know if you remember what your lighthouse statement was back then, or if you've got one that you're working with today. Maybe we can talk about the lighthouse statement and some of the simplicity, because I'm always about simplicity with everything I do as much as possible to keep things simple and to show people it is not actually complicated to create the kind of life that you want to create. 

It may seem like it's going to be messy and it will be messy, but it's not complicated and it is very simple to take a step and then another step and then another step when you have yourself focused on, for instance, we start out with a lighthouse statement. And the lighthouse statement is, how do you want to feel in your life? And to really connect with that, do you want to talk a little bit about your experience with having that lighthouse that just pulls us through the whole journey. It lights the way even when things seem like they are getting difficult. What was your experience with the lighthouse aspect of the journey? 

Sophie: Yeah, thanks for bringing that up. And I do have a lighthouse statement today. It's a very, very interesting and key part of it. First of all, to create that lighthouse statement is an exercise in itself because it really asks us to place ourselves where we want to get. Being understood that right when we are drafting the lighthouse statement, we're not necessarily able, or it's not easy. As you said, it's a simple journey. I mean, the steps and how it's designed is all around simplicity. That's the baseline, but it's not easy. 

And the lighthouse statement, it's an excellent first step to take because it requires that we consciously imagine how we want to be feeling in our life compared to how obviously we are feeling at the start. And there you are asking us to write it in the present tense, which in itself also is a little bit kind of triggering, write it in the present tense, all with kind of obviously positive words. 

And it's really becoming your beacon, the thing that is holding you when the going gets tough and you're really stumbling in those swamps and really having a hard time to take the next step forward on your journey. When you're encountering all of those parts of yourself, that's obviously in the second phase in the healing phase that may not necessarily be believing that you can make it to the end or may even be hindering you from going there. 

And so that statement is really the phrase that is reminding you on a daily basis that, yeah, that's the goal. That's where I want to be, that's how I want to feel in my life. And you're going to get all of those triggers along the way that tell you, what is this feeling? Why should you feel that way? And this is not realistic and all of those triggers, but again, with the group and with the community, with the weekly calls and with support from you, Karen, also obviously, and also the little wins along the way because even in the darkest moments, even when it's difficult, you always know that you're doing this because you have a goal in mind and there is a gold mine waiting for you at the end of the path. 

Karen: And so the thing about having a lighthouse statement is because you are on this journey that you don't know what's going to happen, you don't know where you're going, and it's something that is pulling you, like you said, it's like a beacon that is just shining a light and it is keeping you on track. 

And here's the thing that I think that so many people miss when they try to create something different or make a big change in their life, is they think that they need to see what the end result is going to look like before they move forward. And so that's going to trip you up every single time, every single time. We don't get to see what it looks like in its end result. So that's what I love about the lighthouse statement is because it is shining during those dark points. 

We've got a mantra in Money On Purpose, it's called OSSAAT, which means one small step at a time. And as we take that simple, one small step at a time, we get to our end results and usually in a way that we don't really thought it was going to happen. I know that happened for me. My journey is, and I've talked a little bit about it in other episodes, I went on a path that was completely different than what I thought it was going to be. 

I'd love to move over now to, if you want to share some of the ways that you have healed. Maybe where you are heading, what you're doing in your life now, but just kind of first starting with what did you heal? How did you heal? 

Sophie: That's a big one. So yeah, what did I heal? I healed in a way, I guess I was dismembered before embarking on the journey. I was all in my head and it was like I had no body really. I was just a head and I was thinking my life. I was thinking everything. I was in thought mode always. 

And also very importantly, I felt like I had no validity as a human being. I didn't really know what being human actually meant because everything that was painful, everything that was uncomfortable was numbed. I was in anesthesia mode all the time. That's why I was working so hard in my job, in my family. I had this perfectionism illness that I was creating a perfect image in my head of what things were to look like. And I was thriving like hell in every minute of my life to make it happen, to make it look like I had it in my head because I was completely, I mean, the main feeling in my life was shame. I was ashamed of everything. 

And I guess this journey brought me to a place of kindness towards all of the parts of myself that were in this constant battle and were fighting against each other like hell. So in my psyche, it was a battlefield of all of those parts of myself just fighting fiercely against each other, each screaming what their view was that the life should be. And I was just exhausted by conducting this battle. 

And I remember a moment, a very pivotal moment along the journey where I saw myself in one of those morning meditations that you ask us to do the ABCDE process. And through my free writes also. I don't exactly remember how or when it happened, but at one point, a very pivotal one, I saw myself around a campfire and around that campfire there was the seductress in me. There was also the small child. There was the old hag, or I don’t know how you could call her. There was also a young man. And all of these elements of my psyche for the first time ever were sitting around the campfire together and they were not fighting. This little girl was sitting on the lap of the seductress and she was stroking her hair very gently. And I was the witness of all of those parts, and there was peace for the first time ever. 

Karen: Wow, that is so beautiful. And what you're explaining is this integration of all parts of us that come together in a deep healing process. That's really what healing is. It's an integration of all parts of us together in a gentle way that shows that every part of me is correct. Every part of me is worthy, has a place within me, and that we don't have to, like you said earlier, dismember ourselves. You felt dismembered, you felt torn apart. And so feeling that integration is what this healing journey is. And when you integrate all parts of you, that's when you can start creating anything you want in your life. What are you creating, Sophie? 

Sophie: So yeah, see for me, I made a lot of progress in 2020 when I was actively doing the Money On Purpose program. But the healing phase took a bit longer for me. I felt I had a lot more to heal. And also I didn't build at that point, the level of trust, or I didn't surrender quite enough I guess. So life very aptly brought me to an even deeper journey when it hit me with cancer last year. So last year I had breast cancer, and that was the moment where at the very early beginning of, well after the diagnosis, I became conscious that the missing part for me was that I hadn't healed my ability to receive the gifts of life. And so that's why life brought me to an even deeper canyon of physical suffering or becoming nothing in the journey on my part. 

But it was very useful and revealing because thanks to the tools that I had learned, I was not alone in that deep canyon. I had the ability to journal, I had the ability to meditate. I had all of those elements built in my tool set, I guess. And I decided that I really had to think about what I do next. And so that's what I'm in the process of doing now. So I'm having the luxury because I'm still on this sick-leave scheme to think deeply and to really consider what I want to do with my life. And I've come to that place of deep surrendering. I'm coming to that place of deeper trust in life. I'm building confidence in those tools. I am seeing now on a daily basis that they've been leading me to remission, which hopefully will be confirmed at the end of this month. 

And I'm back working with you, Karen, to create the next phases. I have a new lighthouse statement, which is I am whole and I offer my beauty to the world. I don’t know what form this beauty will take, but now I have the trust and the confidence that something very beautiful is waiting for me on the other side. 

Karen: Oh, Sophie. That is so beautiful. And the healing journey is going to be different for everyone, and it's going to take as long as it needs to take. And just having the tools of trust, trusting in yourself, trusting in life, trusting in Source, that you're being brought down a path that is for your highest good, and it's so beautiful that you are using your healing journey to really embrace that message of being able to receive for yourself. 

That is what creating is manifesting in life is, the ability to receive. And so many of us are cut off from that ability to receive. We're cut off, we cut ourselves off because we're giving, giving, giving. We're trying to do things perfectly. We're trying to control everything. And that was very much a part of your journey, Sophie, that you shared with us. And I'm so grateful that you're at a place of deep, deep healing right now and moving forward with an energy that is really going to make such a difference in the world with your own story and your own ability to help others now who are going through really tough times. 

So I want to thank you, Sophie. Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful heart with us and for being brave when you hopped on the boat that was the Money On Purpose journey. Because the healing that you've done for yourself and the connection you've made with your own life's purpose is sending the most beautiful ripples and waves out into the world to help others with their own healing journeys. And what you've got cooking up right now is going to be doing that. So thank you so much for being here. Is there anything else that you'd like to share with the community? 

Sophie: The one thing that I would like to add is that participating in this program has really been pivotal in my life journey. I am not the same person I used to be. I love myself now, it took me a long time to figure out what loving yourself means, but now since that moment of sitting around the campfire, I have built true loving presence for all of those parts of myself. 

And even when I am feeling anger or sadness or discomfort or fear, I am no longer taken aback by those feelings. I'm able to welcome them and to be patient with them. And I have tools that will never leave me through which I can investigate those feelings and understand what they're trying to tell me so that I can take the next step on the journey, which as you said, never ends. And so the journey is not easy, but it's beautiful. And I'm discovering new landscapes on a daily basis. So I can only encourage people to prepare their backpack and prepare their good walking shoes and prepare their, what do you call that, the soothing stuff so that they can keep going, but it's really worth it. It's really worth taking all of that with you and embarking on knowing yourself better. 

Karen: Thank you for sharing that, Sophie, because really everything that you need is on the journey. It's all there for you. The backpack is there, all the pieces that you need to put into the backpack are there. It's just you that needs to be brave and step out onto the path on that little bridge from Comfort Zone Island over to stepping onto that bridge and then coming along with us on what you said is the most beautiful journey. It's not always easy, but sometimes it is really beautiful and you get these moments of real clarity and you get to see how you are progressing along this beautiful journey. So thank you so much Sophie. I am going to invite people to join the Money On Purpose waitlist for the new live journey that is coming up. You just go to moneyonpurpose.com. 

Thank you so much, Sophie, for being here. And thank you everybody else for joining us because when you heal your blocks and you step into your life's purpose, you become a force for good in the world. Thank you so much for joining Sophie and me today, and I'll see you next time. 

If you're ready to start creating the lifestyle of your dreams, I want to invite you to join GPS, my Gratitude Practice for Success program, where you'll learn my unique and proven manifesting process. It's simple, it's powerful, and it's already helping hundreds of people go from thinking their dreams were impossible to making them happen quickly. Whether you want to manifest your dream home, your soulmate, a brand new career living your life's purpose, or even financial freedom, it's yours to claim now. Just head over to kcpowell.com/gps and I will show you how.